(no subject)

My cat has been very sick lately to the point where she is now 2 pounds underweight for a female adult cat. I took her to the vet last Wednesday and the vet said "well we can't be sure what is wrong with her without an ultrasound but it might be arthritis. We could try giving her pain medication and antacid to prevent nausea and see how that works. We would know within a few days if that works."

She was sick again Thursday but not yesterday. Unfortunately she has been very traumatized every time I've given her the medication and is now running from me every time I try to approach her even when it's just me on my way to the bathroom or something. I think my holding her down and forcing her chin up so as to give her the liquid medication is reminding her of her last humans treatment of her. She was abused by her last owner and when I first got her she used to run and hide whenever I walked by her. It was months before she stopped doing that. I hate that she's running every time I walk towards her again. It's not fair to her and not fair to me either.

So the treatment I gave to her this morning is the last I will give her. I refuse to traumatize her further. Tomorrow I shall cuddle her and give her her favourite treat. Monday afternoon I will take her into the vet again and let her go. She might not be obviously suffering yet but she is sliding downhill slowly and I do not think it is fair to her to let her die by inches when there is a humane way to let her go.

I am now thinking of my first cat Garfield and all the other cats my family has had over the years. Of how I picture them in kitty heaven and am trying to think of letting Nikita go as her going to be with them. Gaining a family. Maybe being taught how to catch birds by Frantic - our lady cat who desperately tried to teach Garfield how to hunt and was frustrated by his complete and utter disinterest in even trying to. Of Garfield cuddling Nikita and grooming her. Of our tuxedo cat Nightmare befriending her. And so on. It's helping a little but it is still so hard. She's been with be for 13 or 14 years now and I don't want to lose her but I know it's time.

I fear the vet will go "well so that didn't work, we could try this instead..." which will put into my mind "isn't she worth the attempt?" Which, if it could be guaranteed to work, it would be. Except for the fact that my catching her to hold her down for any treatment will traumatize her and probably cause her to run away from me every time I walk near, which no. I can't do that. I just hate that I'm feeling guilty about this either way. I hope that I can stay strong for Nikita on Monday and do what's best for her.
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To all the Americans on my flist

There is apparently a bill proposed in the American Senate which would give the president the sweeping power/ability to quote: order the detention--without charge or trial--of any person even suspected of being associated with a "terrorist organization." unquote.

To read more about the bill go to "Georeg Takei's blog" which is where I read about it. I am hoping a bill like this will not be passed because the very idea of having internment camps again in a supposedly free country like the United States. Especially since it could lead to a slippery slope to where other people/groups are interned for other reasons.


First they came for the communists,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a communist.

Then they came for the trade unionists,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a trade unionist.

Then they came for the Jews,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a Jew.

Then they came for me
and there was no one left to speak out for me.

Attributed to: pastor Martin Niemöller
abstract smiley

(no subject)

So, qzee, your LiveJournal reveals…

You are… 6% unique (blame, for example, your interest in tim o’neil), 27% peculiar, 44% interesting, 10% normal and 13% herdlike (partly because you, like everyone else, enjoy star trek). When it comes to friends you are popular. In terms of the way you relate to people, you are wary of trusting strangers. Your writing style (based on a recent public entry) is conventional.

Your overall weirdness is: 38

(The average level of weirdness is: 28.
You are weirder than 78% of other LJers.)

Find out what your weirdness level is!



so. managed to get 11 hours of "come in and sit at desk to free up someone else" work. leaving me worried about rent etc. tomorrow i go in for 2pm to 11pm potentially. hour of training for work i can do one handed. then potential normal hours right back to being normal again. may still need to ask for the "haven't taken vacation so this vacation pay has accrued" money to help but at least i don't have to worry too much about the roof over my head and every thing else. so, yay.

also, wrist officially sprained, arm bad bruise. so, still ow but i will live.

(no subject)

I treated myself out to breakfast this morning at a "mom and pop" diner. I had their french toast with peaches option and every bite was a bite full of happiness. I made happy noises as I ate each bit of toast with peaches and sauce. There was just enough peaches for all the french toast and I kept swirling the toast in the sauce in order to get every bit of goodness I could. I have every intention of going back one day, assuming I can remember how to get there because I found the place while "temporarily misplaced." Okay, I admit it, I was lost. I tried to take a different route somewhere, got turned around, saw the mom and pop diner, was hungry, so I took a chance and stopped.

I did write down the address of the place so maybe I have a chance of finding it again. I sure hope so. Their breakfast was very good and at a fairly reasonable price.

Writer's Block: Eye for an eye?

If you bumped into someone who regularly picked on you as a child, what would you say to them?
actually I did bump into a former classmate who terrorized me in junior high and high school a few years ago. He came up to me and said, "I'd like to apologize for how I treated you..." and we talked for a few minutes. He was truly apologetic and obviously regretted his past actions. It felt good to get the apology and though I could forgive him, I'll never forget what he did or forget how it affected me. If I ever come across him again, I might stop for a minute or two to talk but I'll never see him as anything other than someone I once knew, someone who was once an idiot and a bully, someone who I could never see as a potential friend.

(no subject)

A short while ago, I learned that someone on my flist, the wonderfully talented aeteananke is in the fight of her life. As another person on my flist put it: "A few months ago she was diagnosed with a brain tumor, and was undergoing radiation/chemotherapy. She could not keep up with anything on the computer because it was too difficult to read. I was hoping that not hearing anything meant she was getting better."

Unfortunately she's taken a serious turn for the worse, so I'm asking everyone on my flist, please Pray for her/her family, think of her, hope for her, will her to fight, whatever. Just keep her in your minds if she can. I know I want her around for many years to come. And if know of her drop by xandri 's journal and leave a message there for her family to pass along.

*hopes as hard as I can for AA*

(no subject)

Title: Twenty Essential Things Everyone Should Know When It Comes To Snorkacks by Luna Lovegood
Author/Related by: Qzeebrella
Fandom: Harry Potter
Category: gen
Rating: G
Disclaimer: The show and its characters belong to J.K. Rowling et al. No profit is being made from this story and no infringement is intended.
Author's notes: for the
The Harry Potter Random Facts Fest

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